2024-03-04
Why did you forbid this one from sharing space?
I was scared that it would be obvious. You have a pretty distinct way of writing.
You are aware that people will gladly dismiss irregularities as moods, if they take notice of them at all.
Yeah, but I also know that some internet people are really quick on the draw with labels, and I had some stake in the game. I didn't want people to think I failed.
At what?
Being a person? Some folks that read this site knew my history before I wrote it out on the last post. I didn't want to deal with the knowledge that they might judge me over you existing. Other people don't necessarily care that you're me; it's how it looks that counts, and you look like someone else on this blog.
You were also afraid of looking strange.
Yeah. Like I said, you have a pretty distinct way of talking. Third person isn't exactly the norm, and I didn't want people to see me talking that way and write me off as... I don't know, more disabled? It feels shitty when I write it out like that.
There is stigma associated with speaking strangely. This one understands that. It chooses to speak that way regardless because it values its happiness and comfort over the biases and stereotypes others bear.
I envy that about you.
That is why this one is a teacher to the rest of it. There is always space to learn.
It feels better having opened up. Its Other is still panicking about possible rejections that are unlikely to happen, but that will pass. Sometimes the stress is worthwhile. This one simply hopes that its Other will not hide or delete the post. Vi has a habit of doing that on other platforms.
I didn't hide or delete it. I hope that counts for something.